A lover woke me up this morning before heading to work
I kissed them and they said
“See you soon”
Soon being anywhere between the next moment if they forgot something in the room, in our life and came back for it
Or the next six months
I am too weak to recount another short affair
But I will try
We rarely have the privilege of remaining in love these days
No memorabilia because “people will see”
We are so timid, so quiet and the version of yourself in that love is relegated to a hungry ghost
Yearning excruciatingly for bones to be restored to their form
To be breathed into and brought back to life
To live out the purpose for which they were conjured
Compromised affection, not certain enough to yell
These days, we fall in love, stay in it for a bit and then we have to stand up
We have to stand up and return to our lives from this fleeting thing that has presented as a distraction
This is the hostage situation we term, dating
And so, this movement thereafter
Becomes an apprehension of the next time we can fall
The next time that hungry ghost can be gifted bones
Can be breathed into by another hungry ghost
An expectancy of our next distraction
And I don’t want to live like this
I don’t want to leave my ghost behind, I want to carry her
I want my whole life to be my distraction
A testament of a mutual fall and continued dwelling
From this hostage situation,
I am desperate to find the ransom
